1. TAKING THINGS PERSONALLY
There are many things that we encounter on a daily basis that is out of our control. Many times we come across particular situations and immediately associate someone’s actions with something that we may have done wrong. it is important to consistently remind ourselves that: most of the time the way someone is behaving has nothing to do with us.
A lot of people are going through hardships and struggles each and every day: trouble in their relationship, a loved one is sick, struggling mentally, having a big fight, feeling discontent with their job, or struggling to pay the bills. Keep all these possibilities in mind when someone cuts you off or ghosts you or overreacts on the road while driving or does something that makes you angry or hurts your feelings.
If someone treats you a certain way because of something you did, it is up to that person to communicate that to you and be open about it, However, if a person is important to you and something they did/said keeps replaying in your mind over and over again, ask yourself: why is this bothering me so much? Do I think there is some truth in what they said? It may be helpful to talk and approach this person and ask if there is something that you may have done for that comment/action. IF THIS PERSON IS NOT SIGNIFICANT TO YOU: GOODBYE.
2. HOLDING THINGS IN
A lot of times, we hold things in because we don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings or we don’t want to deal with being vulnerable and the possibilities that could unfold for expressing ourselves. There are two issues with holding things in: it builds up and others can’t read our minds, so the person will continue to do/say hurtful things because they are most likely unaware that it is inflicting pain. Regardless of how hard it may be at times, the benefit of releasing your truth is that it strengthens relationships and makes you more comfortable with expressing your needs.
If someone values and respects you, they will honor your feelings and voice. It is courageous to speak your truth.
Holding things in is like carrying a lot of baggage on your shoulders. You’ll continue to hold things in and eventually you won’t be able to hold on to one single ounce any longer and drop a load of bags unexpectedly. You’ll lose all control, and say things that you did not think through before saying them, leading to a big mess that at times is NOT fixable.
3. WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK OF US
We care so much about what other people think, but in reality, other people are not thinking about us because they are so wrapped up in their own personal lives Let’s say someone is thinking about you: you will cross their mind, they will have an opinion, and then they get right back to thinking about themselves. If someone keeps on thinking about your life then it is very important to remind yourself that if they are giving you so much importance in their life that is their problem, not yours if you keep looking at yourself from other people’s perspective it will not lead you anywhere, you will be all tired one day proving yourself to others, It is so important to constantly remind yourself of your: potential, capabilities, and intentions. You have the right to choose whose opinion is valuable to you. Living your life based on others’ opinions of you is going to create a mind full of regrets, wishful thinking, and constant unhappiness.
4. TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS
Toxic relationships are very destructive- especially romantic relationships. They tend to feel almost like an addiction. You can’t help but answer every text, every phone call, even when you know you will end up getting hurt. To let go of a toxic relationship, or negative people in your life, you have to be fully committed to walking away. You have to remember that as much as you like the other person, you cannot change people. Spend some time in solitude and reflect, analyze your relationship with that person, and if you find a solution to fix the relationship go ahead with trying to resolve issues but if it’s not in your hands do not feel caged, make up your mind and move on.
5. UNHEALTHY HABITS
Focus on one at a time, one that bothers you the most. Is it overindulging in food or other habits? Is it not getting enough sleep, not exercising? Don’t make a “resolution” but make a plan instead. How exactly are you going to change things? What tools will you use to make the change easier for yourself? Don’t try to change everything at once- focus on one habit at a time.
6. FEAR OF FAILURE
The thing we all struggled with at some point in life. One of the easiest ways for me to let go of the fear of failure is to tell myself that at some point, it will happen. So what? What’s the worst that can happen if I fail? How else will I learn, if not by doing, trying, or by making mistakes? As long as you keep trying, keep learning and keep getting up, you’re winning. If you hold on to your past just a little too hard, you’re holding a grudge and don’t know how to let go and forgive. Don’t be afraid of change. Let go of anything and anyone that doesn’t make you happy. And, no matter how small, do not forget to give yourself credit for the things you’ve accomplished. So what if it takes a bit longer than planned? So what, if you fail miserably, time and time again? Every single time you fail, you learn something new about yourself. Every single time you fail, you still get closer to getting where you want to be because you get to carry those lessons with you. My wish for you is that you feel happy and content in your life; a life full of love, health, laughter, new adventures, and lessons, and that you let go of everything that limits you or holds you back.
About the Author
It’s amazing to read your blogs…
Just when I needed it most! Thank you so much for this! At times, it’s just the proper use of words that makes it sink in our minds. Thanks once again!
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